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Some days, you just can’t find a grownup to talk to. Or maybe I’m spending too much time online lately…

I don’t have a dog in this fight, but I appreciated how Colleen Doran banished dozens of comment threads to the kiddie table simply by acting like an adult: “(Please) don’t pick on Alex Ross. He painted a comic book cover, he didn’t murder your grandmother. Geez.”

BLOGGERS’ WORKSHOP: CLICHE=EPIC FAIL

Don’t give me that “meme” crap. Richard Dawkins didn’t propose the concept so lazy fanboys can pretend to express themselves. If you can’t put it in your own words, then you’re only going through the motions of having an opinion without stopping to actually formulate one. Cut and paste < thinking.

• This. Might. Have. Been. Effective. The. First. Time. Someone. Did. It. – Everyone since? A. Tiresome. Dipshit.
• Goodness, as in “creamy comicbooky goodness” or “more vintage Kirby goodness,” ad nauseum – See above. Dipshit time.
• Fail alone doesn’t say anything. Tell us why, or you just sound like a…oh, you know.

(Bonus tip: Spellcheck is only Step One.)

BLOGOSPHERE BRAINTEASER: WHO AM I?

OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!! OH MY GODDDDD!!!!!

I’m a ‘40s bobbysoxer, and Grant’s my Frankie S.

Ship of Fools

* My pal wrote a blog entry! About scary movies!

* Alan Moore still hasn’t apologized for not sharing my opinions! It makes me so mad I want to storm away from my parents’ dinner table!

* Another pal of mine wrote a blog entry! About going to a convention!

* People who disagree with me are just trying to sound sophisticated! Newsprint is icky! I’m not a critic, I’m a regular guy who coincidentally writes exactly like a critic!

* People still like scary movies, even sophisticated critics! Sweet!

* I wrote something! My pals are going to link to it!

The Man Who Fell to Awesomeness

Sure, I’ll eat it.

(Give up? A hint: This is an energetic and often insightful young blogger whose reliance on ongoing features often allows him to slide into self-parody. Good as he is now, he’ll be infinitely more readable when he starts applying the discipline needed to become less predictable.)

Thanks, I feel teh awesome now. Back to work.